Safe Dating Tips

Safe Dating Tips

Meeting new people can be exciting, but safety should always come first when interacting with someone unfamiliar. Use your judgment and prioritize your well-being, whether you are messaging online or meeting face-to-face. While you can’t control others’ behavior, there are precautions you can take to protect yourself during your time on Shamy.

 

Online Safety

Never Send Money or Share Banking Information
Do not send money under any circumstances, especially through wire transfers, even if someone claims they are in an urgent situation. Sending funds this way is essentially like handing over cash: once it’s gone, it’s nearly impossible to track or recover. Avoid giving out details that could allow access to your financial accounts. If another user asks you for money, report it immediately.

For advice on steering clear of romance scams, visit the U.S. Federal Trade Commission website here or watch the video provided below.

Protect Your Private Information
Never disclose sensitive information such as your home address, workplace, or details about your routine (for example, what gym you attend and when). Parents should also limit what they share about their children, including names, school details, or identifying information like age or gender.

Stay on the Shamy App
Keep communication within Shamy while getting to know someone. Conversations on Shamy are filtered by our Safe Message technology, which helps screen harmful content. People with bad intentions often try to move chats to text, WhatsApp, email, or calls quickly.

Be Cautious of Distant or Overseas Relationships
Be alert for scammers claiming they are from your country but stuck abroad, particularly if they request financial help. Be wary of anyone unwilling to meet in person or join a phone/video call, as they may not be who they claim to be. If someone avoids direct answers or pushes for commitment before meeting, treat it as a warning sign.

Report Inappropriate or Suspicious Activity
You know when a line has been crossed. If it happens, tell us. Examples include:

  • Requests for money or donations

  • Users under the age of 18

  • Harassment, intimidation, or offensive comments

  • Misconduct during or after a date

  • Fake or misleading profiles

  • Spam or attempts to sell goods or services

You can report concerns from a profile page, in the chat window, or by emailing [email protected]

Secure Your Account
Always choose a strong password and be cautious when signing in on shared or public computers. Shamy will never email you asking for your login details. If you receive a suspicious email requesting this, report it. If you log in via your phone number, do not share your SMS verification code. Any site asking for this code is not affiliated with Shamy.

 

Meeting in Person

Take Your Time
Don’t rush into meeting or moving communication off Shamy. Ask questions to identify any red flags. A phone or video call can be a good step before arranging an in-person date.

Meet in Public Places
Choose busy, public spots for your first few meetups. Never go to your home, your date’s home, or another private location initially. If someone pressures you into going somewhere private, end the date.

Tell Someone You Trust
Share your plans with a friend or family member, including when and where you’ll be. Always keep your phone charged and with you.

Stay in Control of Transportation
Make sure you have control over how you arrive and leave. Drive yourself if possible, and have a backup option like a ride-share service or a trusted friend.

Know Your Limits
Be aware of how alcohol or drugs affect you. They can reduce alertness and decision-making. If your date pressures you to drink or use substances more than you want, leave.

Don’t Leave Drinks or Items Unattended
Know where your drink is coming from and never leave it out of sight. Only accept drinks directly from the bartender or server. Many substances used for assault are undetectable. Keep your phone, wallet, and belongings with personal details on you.

Leave If You Feel Unsafe
If something feels off, it’s completely fine to end the date early. Trust your instincts. If you feel in danger, discreetly ask the bartender, server, or staff for help.

 

LGBTQ+ Travel

Travel can pose unique challenges. While Shamy supports inclusivity for all sexual orientations and gender identities, some regions have laws that specifically target LGBTQ+ people. Before traveling, research the laws and protections in your destination country.

If you’re in a place where it may be unsafe, consider logging out of or removing your Shamy app temporarily.

Extra caution is necessary in regions where law enforcement uses dating apps as traps, or where laws criminalize same-sex communication and penalize encounters more harshly. For updated legal information by country, visit ILGA World here, and consider supporting their research with a donation.

 

Sexual Health & Consent

Protect Yourself
Using condoms consistently and correctly can greatly reduce the risk of contracting or spreading STIs like HIV. Some infections like HPV or herpes can spread through skin contact, but risks can be lowered with vaccinations.

Know Your Status
Since many STIs don’t show visible symptoms, regular testing is important for protecting yourself and others. Stay informed about your health and get tested at a clinic near you (U.S. only).

Communicate About Sexual Health
Talk openly with your partner about STI testing before becoming intimate. In some areas, knowingly transmitting an STI is a crime. For help starting this conversation, check out tips here.

Consent
Consent is essential. It should always be clear, enthusiastic, and ongoing. Check in with your partner regularly. Consent can be withdrawn at any time, and intimacy is never something owed. If your partner seems hesitant, uncomfortable, or is impaired by substances, do not proceed. Learn more about consent here.

 

Resources for Support or Assistance

Keep in mind that even if you follow every safety tip, no method is 100% foolproof. If you experience something negative, it is not your fault, and help is available. 

If you are in immediate danger or need urgent help, dial 911 (U.S. and Canada) or contact your local emergency services.

 

Still Have Questions?

Submit a request by emailing us [email protected]